"I love you more than I know how to feel"

Sunday, July 29, 2012


i can almost not stand being home for the sole reason that EVERYTHING reminds me of cody!  i was just thinking about it yesterday, i haven't had to be home without him yet, because i left to college before he left on his mission. i hate going into town for work and having to constantly remind myself that i can't drive over to his place and see him.  i can't text him, or call him.  everywhere i go, i can't help but think "i went there and there with him. we went into this place together, we hung out here a lot, i wonder if cody would like to go here, we got ice cream there a lot!" it is seriously driving my mind crazy! it seems like it was different at college because i KNEW that cody wasn't there but now that i'm back, it just feels like he is supposed to be here too.  i now need to get used to it here too.  
so the other day i went to Art in the Park.  pretty much it was a million booths in this park showing different kinds of hand made art.  there was jewelery and stained glass and clothes and photography, and paintings, and girly bows, and a million other things. anyways, i love that kind of stuff and i couldn't figure out why i was in such a grouchy mood.  it was because i couldn't get over how badly i wanted to be there with cody.  more than usual because i know cody would love nothing more in the world to go to something like that with me. he is sooo artsy and i love it and i just wanted to talk to him about art ideas and talk about decorating for our future home. it made me incredibly sad. 
SO ... in two years, cody and i are SO going together! in his last letter he thanked me for waiting and promised that he would make up for the time he was gone.  he said he would try to freeze time and make it last forever and that it would be worth it.
i know it will
i love him so much!

playing basketball with him (i so cheated)
picking him up from work and fitting his bike into my car
thumb wars (again, i cheated)
walks in the park and feeding the birds
speed! ALL the time!
foot massages
guitar playing and singing
drawing pictures together
doing his hair
coordinating our outfits
photo shoots
holding his hand while driving
tickling his armpit every time he would stretch
late night ice cream runs
unexpected flowers

1 comment:

  1. *big hugs*. I don't know what i can say to take a tiny bit of the pain away, but if you ever want to hang out, i'm more than happy! You can even whine and talk about how much you miss him if you want, i won't mind! Love you so much Amy!